Saqib can I ask you a question? : Ambition

Saqib can I ask you a question?

Yes my cauliflower, I am quit hungry though.

I will keep it short, do you remember our last conversation? You talked about ambition. You were quite negative about ambition itself, I am disturbed by that thought.

I was disturbed as well when I heard this for the first time, but the more I think about my cauliflower1own ambition the more I realize it is a deep inferiority complex in me which has a tremendous need to show to the world look how great I am. Don’t get me wrong this is the answer I can only find for myself after a deep investigation into myself.

Can there be then no ambition without inferiority complexes?

I am sure that there is and that it is valid for many out there. But all I can say for myself, I see no other deeper motivation for myself to be ambitious then to show to the world look I am better than you think of me, I am not a nobody.

Hmm perhaps If I had more time we could have discussed more in depth, bon appetite Saqib

Thank you my cauliflower

Tiger Philosophy lesson 152: Why Devdas never loved Parvati!

It feels strange to accuse  Devdas, who has become our symbol of love as an advocate of  hate!  The more I think about Devdas the more his character starts to unveil his real nature. What I thought to be  a beautiful truth appears to be an ugly lie. Parvati was never the great love of Devdas, she was rather a beautiful means towards his  pathological goal.

Why would Parvati  love Devdas so much, who has only  written her 3 letters in 10 years. How gracefully she returns his ‘generous’ favor, by  burning an oil lamp for 10 years in his long expectations. Is she not living in a fantasy by denying the reality in front of her? Holding to a picture of time long ago, barricading growth and waiting to be rescued.

How have they become symbols for love?  

10 years have passed, the world has changed, everything has changed  but they keep on holding to this blurry image of their youth.

The  immature character of Devdas and Parvati  manifest in many ways in their life. Parvati who is living under the  psychological slavery of Devdas with her own consent and Devdas who has lived his whole live under the tyranny of his father. Like father like sun, Devdas enjoys tyrannizing  the people who love him. When it comes to important decisions taking he  withdraws himself from every form of  responsibility.  In the end  he destroys  a dream which was a fantasy which could have become a reality.

Despite Parvati’s childish behavior I can live with her, I have a deep respect for her patience and devotion towards Devdas.  But with Devdas I cannot be so forgiving I  have a personal vendetta with him.  After deserting  Parvati, his true nature comes in being. A pathological being craving for attention from others by inflicting pain to himself, a masochist of the highest degree. I would have been happy if he had left the scene after abandoning Parvati and never returning back. The innocence of Devdas is burning with desire to see his love ones in agony. Devdas  has taken two vows, 1st vow “to drink till death separates him from life” and 2nd vow to visit Parvati’s house one time before dying. One vow is to make his own life miserable  and other to ruin happiness of Parvati.

The entrance  of Chandramukhi  in Devdas live  is again a confirmation of his tyranny. Chandramukhi  who has accepted the misery of life, has accepted self-hate as love, has accepted love as means  to power. Who chooses Devdas as her lover as her worshipper, because in Devdas she sees a person with greater self-hate then her own.

I don’t think that Devdas  ever loved Parvati or cared about Chandramukhi, he loved pity he craved for attention which was  nourished by a deep self-hate. He enjoyed every bit of that misery, every  bit of pain and torment towards himself till the very end of  his life.

The love of a masochist.

End note: Then a question arises, why I would care to write about Deva and Paro?


My fitness goal 2013



My fitness goal for 2013, It has been defined quit S-M-A-R-T.

S-pecifiek        –>  body fat % from 20 to 15 while maintaining my current wait
M-easurable    –>  yes every 2 weeks I will check my results
A-ttainable       –>  though but doable
R-elevant         –> yes it keeps me fit, focused and energetic
T-ime-bound    –> within 7 month I must achieve it

It requires great discipline in training, nutrition and rest


Tiger philosophy lesson 151: When I was young, strong and vigorous!




Mr. X when I was young, the world seemed a land of opportunities, an  exciting and exhilarating place to live. I was in demand, the women loved me, people around loved me, I was successful and respected by everybody, I lived life to its fullest.

Nothing was impossible, the sky was the limit. I felt like I could drink poison and still survive, I could jump from a building and not scratch a dime anything I touched could turn into gold a flow of intense energy channeled through my veins.

Now I am old, and the same world seems a land of slavery, hostility and scary place to live in. Much I cannot handle anymore and many battles I cannot win anymore. My opponents are younger,  faster,  smarter and stronger then I am. My knowledge is outdated, my ideas are old and obsolete   it seems that I don’t have much to give to the world anymore.

I was always the head of the family, like a stem of the tree, I was respected, loved, others where dependent of me. Now I am no more than a rotten apple, nobody needs me anymore, I feel useless!

Man wants to feel important, productive, he needs this sense of significance in his life which is driven by challenges he meets. I just don’t have the energy or the willpower anymore to go for that extra mile. My brain has slowed down, I don’t learn new things as easily as I used to and I don’t get excited about anything anymore. It is like the life juice has evaporated in me.

I have difficult time in accepting this reality.  My first encounter with this reality was with my  own sun. Suddenly he could solve problems faster and better then I could, physically he had grown stronger than me. Instead of me teaching him new things he started to teach me. I felt proud but mixed with jealousy, because I  knew he was exalting while I was going downhill.

I never thought that one day I would get old, weak and sick and my life will decay in front of my own eyes.  I never wanted to look at the whole spectrum of life. I focused only on the parts I enjoyed the most, that was when I was young strong and vigorous! Now I feel so alone, everybody I loved are dead or dying. Soon my turn is coming, I am entering the inevitable truth of life,  the death!

Why is it that we get old and weak, why would our creator not make us in a way that we could stay young and healthy forever. Why does our creator want us to see suffer?  Why did he create this circle of birth and death, and if so why did he gave us this conscience of perceiving this decaying? I don’t belive in god or a paradise after life, what is then there for me, or is life  no more than random occurrences in this vast existence.

Are you not afraid of old age or death Mr. X?

………………. I do not see any reason to be afraid Mr. Russell. My answer may shock you as your reasoning has shocked  me. Once a friend said to me, “why do you think about your  own death?” . “Doesn’t everybody”, I thought to myself.

In some sense you could say I died the moment I was born, when my parents bought a cradle for  my birth they should have also bought a coffin as reminder of the inevitable truth. I have thought about every step of my life from the very beginning till the very end. How I will look, feel, think and  what I will be doing when I am old.  How I want the last day of my life to be, how I will  pass from life into the death. Who will be there to cry for me, how I will be buried, which words will I or the other speak  about me. Death will be the crescendo of my life. Not to have thought about this is to have  neglected  the most important thing in live.

Do you which me to proceed Mr. Russell?

Tiger philosophy lesson 150: My love for The X-Men and the similarities between great leaders.

I have always been fascinated by the X-Men. When I was about 10 years old,  I would wake up 5 o’clock in the morning  not to miss any sequel of the  X-Men. These super mutants with their super powers where like a super fantasy for a young boy like me.

X-Men accept being an very exciting cartoon has many  real life dimensions in it.  Topics like discrimination, racism, political instability and  danger for extremism are central themes in the X-Men.  Like in the real world the characters in the X-Men suffer  from identity crisis,  inferiority complexes, guilt and shame. The mutants in the X-Men are divided  into  two groups, one group who want to live in pease, while the other craves on hate. One group sees hope in the future while the  other envision only apocalypse.

During my study in the work of Malcolm X and Martin Luther King I encountered many similarities  between these leaders and the leaders of the  X-Men.

The Similarities:

Charles Xavior and Martin Luther King, both where leaders who believed in the good of mankind. They had an  idealistic view on life they believed in forgetting the past and looking at the future. They believed in non-violence by preserving their own identity. They believed in the system and tried to implement laws and rule which protected and supported there  people (mutants and negro’s). They believed in integration and living in harmony with each other as the true path.

Malcolm X and Magneto,  on the other hand were totally the opposite.  They had tuff life from the very beginning. Malcolm X’s  father was killed and there house burned by the Ku Klux Clans. Magneto’s  parents were  executed  in the Nazi camps during the second world war. There hearths where filled  by fear and hate from the very beginning of there childhood.  They had lost all their  faith in the supreme powers.  They believed  profoundly, that the only solution was a complete segregation. Violence  was the only answer to reach pease and total independence. They provoked their followers to get out of there inferiority complexes  which  where opposed on them. Not them but they  are the superior raise and they must rule upon the whites and the non-mutants. Living in pease was not an option because there enemies  will always hate what is different from them.

They fit so beautifully together in this picture, as I write this I  see the  struggle between good and bad they/we are trapped in.

Tiger philosophy lesson 149: Integrationists are racist in disguise?

The word Integration  has become such a hype in the society we are living in that no political party dares to proceed without this point on their agenda.

First of all I am not saying that integration is not a valuable thing. I am not saying that  speaking a language of  a country does not open many possibilities. I am  not saying  by adopting  to the  environment  one does not enhances  ones  chances of survival. I am not saying that respecting the culture we  are living in isn‘t important. Yet there is something else happening, which is again and again neglected according to my understanding.

The parties  who have put integration of foreigners as their  highest priority on their agenda, have gotten the most support of the Dutch population. This says a lot about the thinking of a nation.

By looking carefully at the whole situation, my  understanding is  that the Dutch society has difficulty in accepting the foreign community as there  equals. We are living in “civilized” times,  it is very difficult to enslave, repress or send the foreigners back to their roots. NO that is not civilized. Although one strong crazy man, with  charismatic  personality and an evil mission  can make everything possible even in a democratic and civilized societies. We are living in modern times, in modern time modern tools are needed to repress the minority and integration is   the modern civilized tool.

Majority of  the people who are pushing so much on integration, have never had real contact with the foreigners. There whole thinking is dominated by a prejudice handed over by other prejudiced minds who  simply can’t bear foreigners as there equals. Some people say, this is the result of all the extremism which is happening around the world at the moment. I am not sure if that is the real case for such a strong support for these parties.

I guarantee you that if all the foreigners start speaking better language then the Dutch people, which is already starting to happen there still won’t  be any integration. I guarantee you that if  all the foreigners were made to lose their  religion there still won’t be any integration. I guarantee you that if everything was done according to what the Dutch society  demands of the foreigners  there still won’t be any integration.

To understand this we must understand the psychology of the men, in this case the Dutch men. He does not want integration but segregation. Integration is a bidirectional  process, if he accept that he has to lose himself in that process. He has to become equal in that process and he does not want to be equal. He has always seen himself superior towards others and has a deep rooted need to keep on seeing himself in the same way.

Many foreigners  in there naïve behavior act like uncles Toms of  the Dutch’s. They too have adopted this idea of integration.  Their confidence and self-esteem is based on the approval of the Dutch men who evaluate their integration by how well they speak Dutch, how well they have adapted to the modern western thinking and culture. These uncles Toms rejoice on the  alms which are given to them.

Again I am not saying that integration isn’t important!

Tiger philosophy lesson 148: Why I think you will not be successful!

First I would like to point out to the reader, the word “you” is not refered  particularly to the reader. I as the writer do not have the answer for you the reader. Rather this is an investigation together into this philosophy.

Before continuing I want to define and isolate the meaning of “success” in  framework of this philosophy. “Success” is climbing higher into the ladder of hierarchical structure of the society. The whole hierarchical structure in the society can be translated into money, power and influence.  In this context I am excluding the meaning of “Success” which can be translated into love and  health.

Being effective in acquiring more success by using  our  friendships as tools to achieve our means. The fittest the more successful survivor will be happier because of more abundance and choices in his life. In this thinking morality is not pursued  actively. Through this philosophy one  achieves higher degree of  morality  unconsciously. It is totally opposite to one who is consciously living a good and moral  life.

The statement:  “We are too busy in our life with our self, that we do not get the most out of our life for our self.”  The more I think about this statement  the more profound this statement becomes.

Having a clear focus which is backed up by an intelligent, disciplined and determined mind is not enough to climb into the ladder of success. A strong  platform of  cooperation is the final ingredient which is needed to get to the next level. From the single selfish gene to this complex bodily structure of  human beings there is tremendous cooperation.  Every single unit wants to survive that is its main objection. To survive it has to cooperate with others, it has to help others to survive to help survive itself.  To be selfish, to be in tune with our nature we need to be unselfish to support our selfish nature.

What does all this mean in practical terms? In order to reach for higher grounds, we need to support  others to climb higher. We need to think in terms of the others  instead of our self. We need to think how we can contribute instead of what we can get out of it. We need to create a strong wall of support for each other. In which ‘everybody’  has a certain sense of power which is created by this strong dynamism  of the group. A foundation of support  so strong that each  person can build his  own empires on it. This strong foundation can be created by being in service of each other. Seeing the challenges of life of  others as our own responsibility.

I am not saying  this from an altruistic point of view  rather my reasons are very  selfish and practical in nature. Majority of the people  will  disagree at this point, because they are already too busy or do not have the high energy level to go for the extra mile. These people have missed  the whole point.

There are some  very effective individuals  who  are successful. The success I am talking about is like the rays of sun and must not be confused for light of the bulb. 

My own failures  and losses in pursuit of success have  made me see things beyond the  visible and have forced me to   hear sounds  through the noise.

An investigation!

Tiger philosophy lesson 147: Genetically wrong

As I was walking, I saw employees  of  Albert Hein –> AH  throwing away fresh flowers.. After my short inquiry, it  seems that AH has a  strict policy of throwing away leftovers.

It does makes you think about the whole situation. The reason of AH is simple, they have to maintain certain level  of  demand and supply. It is much more profitable for them to throw away then to give it away.

This is not just the case with AH, our whole system of society  and economic  is based on these principles. In one part of the world, millions of people are starving of hunger while in the other part of the world food  for millions of people is thrown away, which could have saved those millions of people from dying.

The system stimulates us to behave in certain manner.  There seems to be something fundamentally wrong with the systems. But how can we create a correct and just system if the creator in matter is  wrong and unjust by nature? How can a creator create  anything other than his own image?

There  seems to be something  physical, something genetically wrong with us  human beings. We are  programmed to create systems which are very helpful to a certain group but at the same time very harmful to greater whole.

We can solve the AH problem by giving the flowers to hospitals or elderly houses. That will not stop somebody else from doing something else   somewhere else, which will be good for few but harmful to greater mass. We as human beings have this error or destructive side genetically build in us. We need to build  these destructive systems for the survival of that destructive part in us. At the same time we don’t have any other  way to build anything else then this destructive systems  to our disposal.

Losing my hope for a better world!

Voltaire The Philosophical Dictionary

I received this book 2 years ago on my birthday. Voltaire is a pseudonym used in this book. This book is assembled like a dictionary, every word can be seen as a chapter and is not sequential nor has any chapter any direct relationship with each other.

In this book Voltaire discusses subjects like, Trinity, Theism, Superstition. morality, virtue, god, love, compassion, fanaticism, motivation… It is an ongoing assemblance of subjects which are related to religion and morality. His major focus lies on Christianity and the bible. He discusses many of the books of bible in great detail, like job, genesis, psalms, Jacob.

Voltaire ridicules the religious thinking and the scriptures in a very witty way. His ridicule comes out of a deep understanding of cultures, languages and a thorough study of religion history and scriptures. He points out falsehood in the Christianity which are accepted buy the church but cannot be traced back into the scriptures.

He explains how many traditions which existed before the religions became part of the religions like circumcision . His sharp remarks and a funny way of writing makes this book a master piece. This book created a revolution in France toward Christianity and religious thinking and has become a  source of inspiration to many other philosophers.


Tiger philosophy lesson 146: My view on the Dutch-mentality part 1

I told my neighbor  that I had climbed our roof to inspect for  damage. I discovered that  the leaves where blocking the rainwater from draining into the pipes. This was causing the water to leak in the house.

The first thing my neighbor said, “next time I will  climb the roof  and inspect it. This way we can divide the inspecting load equally among each other”. His statement did two things to me. First of all it made me conscious of Him and I and secondly  it created a disappointment of short sidedness in me. This part of the Dutch-mentality I always had difficulty coping with.

What he communicated to me where two things. First of all he assumed that his inspecting the roof and sharing the burden will also be seen fair  to me. His assuming  shows a certain arrogance in his (Dutch) behavior.  Secondly  what he communicated was  his conditional pattern thinking. You do this then I will do that, one time you clean next time I will clean, one time you help me next time I will help you, one time you pay next time I will pay. This behavior has become so much part of the  Dutch-mentality  that these principles are being  applied to the most intimate  relationships. You love me then I will love you,  you give me this much I will give you so much. Nothing seems to be unconditional in the Dutch-mentality. Everything is weighed and calculated towards a perfect harmonious  balance.

A average non Dutch-mentality person has difficulty in coping with this attitude. I see many  non-Dutch’s, specially who are born here  adopting this attitude which is in my opinion an degradation in  values. Also I must express that I feel this attitude is responsible for  major development of the Dutch society. it is a very effective working mechanism. It has provided the Dutch-mentality with lot of benefits, I wonder at what cost… ……………….??

For past 25 years I have lived with the Dutch people and tried to understand them. I think that I understand the Dutch-mentality better than the Dutch person understands himself. Because a healthy person will not try to figure out what is health. A happy person will not try to define what is happiness. A fish in the ocean will not search for water. The person who is in need will investigate.

My love for Dutch-mentality makes me say things about the Dutch culture. A Dutch person cannot appreciate the Dutch-mentality as much I can. A Dutch person cannot condemn  other cultures as much I can. It is my love-hate relationship with this Dutch-mentality which provokes me to speak.

My neighbor